It’s the 55th anniversary of MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE, and let’s just dive right into it. This movie gets so much shit. It really does. It seems like every time someone does a poll, or a website counts down “The Worst Movies of All Time,” MANOS is on there somewhere. Sometimes right at the top. It’s such a lazy answer. It’s such a go-to answer, I wonder if everyone who says it’s the worst movie of all time has even seen the movie. “But Sarah Jane, are you saying MANOS isn’t a bad movie?,” some of you might be asking. No, I’m not saying that. By all accounts, it isn’t a great movie, or even a good movie by most standards. What I am saying is that MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE isn’t the worst movie ever made. That’s what I’m saying.
I think for most of us, or at least many of us, our first exposure to MANOS was Mystery Science Theater 3000. It’s one of my favorite episodes of the show. There are so many memorable lines from that show, too many to mention here, but two of them are absolute faves, including “They like kissin’ — go figure,” which my husband and I say to our 11-year-old son whenever any couple is kissing on screen, much to his consternation. But my favorite line is Joel’s “Every frame of this movie looks like someone’s last known photograph” — that kills me every time. It’s legit a funny episode, but they surely do not do the movie any favors. At separate times, both TV’s Frank and Dr. F apologize to Joel (and us) for the film, saying just how awful it is. I think most of the reputation for the film is due to MST3K. Again, it’s not a good movie, I’m with them there, but also, again, not the worst movie every made.
Look, the only reason this movie even exists is because Harold P. Warren was sitting in an El Paso bar with Stirling Silliphant, writer of Route 66, shooting the shit, and Warren bet Silliphant that it was easy to make a horror film. And thus, MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE was born. It looks every bit of the $19,000 he raised to shoot the film. He hired local theatre actors who made fun of Warren because he didn’t really know how to make a movie.
My husband and I like to watch the movie on its own sometimes sans the MST3K treatment. He says and I agree 100%, the movie isn’t good but it’s so purely intentioned. Everything Harold P. Warren (who also plays Michael) put up on that screen is what he wanted to be there. Did he know what he was doing? Well, no, but he did try ,and that’s more than can be said for some $200 million modern films coming out today. Those movies went through committee, were written and shot by people who do know what they’re doing, and some of those are worse to sit through than MANOS is, that’s for sure.
I love MANOS because it’s charming to me. I like that Warren had no clue how to make a film. What you see is what you get. I love the crazy jazz score, and especially “Torgo’s Theme.” It was such an amazing touch to use that as the end credits rolled on MST3K for this movie. The mismatched, nearly non-existent continuity is another thing that is special about the film. The kissing couple, out there kissing for what seems like 48 hours, is great to me. It’s hard to make that part of El Paso look good, no matter who is filming it, but I liked that Warren thought that scrub would make an amazing location for his horror film. That poor editor, James Sullivan. Apparently, Warren rented a camera that only shot 32 seconds of film at a time, because the camera had to be wound by hand. Add that to the fact that because he had rented said camera, he needed to get it back on time, so he hurried through each scene. Mix in that zero continuity, and Sullivan had a Herculean task to put that film together. It all adds to the magic that is MANOS, and it’s all part of why I love it.
So, tonight, when you’re scrolling through ten different streaming services for something to watch, why not throw on MANOS: THE HANDS OF FATE? Either version, straight or MST3K — the choice is yours. It’s streaming now for free on Hoopla and Kanopy. It’s also streaming on ShoutFactoryTV if you have a subscription, and it’s on Tubi TV with ads.
I’m beat. I’m gonna hit the stain.
Tags: Blu-ray, Diane Adelson, Diane Mahree, El Paso, Harold P Warren, Horror, Independent Film, Jackey Neyman, John Reynolds, MST3K, Mystery Science Theater 3000, Robert Guidry, Robin Redd, Sherry Proctor, Stephanie Nielson, Stirling Silliphant, Synapse Films, Texas, Tom Neyman
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