With each falling leaf, like grains of sand through the hourglass… no, that won’t work. Too cliche. As the air becomes that much more crisp… is it crisp or crisper? Crispier? Let me look it up. Oh shit, what time is now? That took four hours!? And why do I keep writing about the weather? This isn’t the teleprompter for Tom Skilling and I do not go outside! Scrap it. Start again. Just be real, direct, and honest. Speak from the heart and write what you know. Ok, so in ROCKY V (1990), Balboa has a whole speech for Tommy Gunn about the power of fear. When controlled, it can make you stronger, faster, and tougher in order to defeat your adversary — however, unchecked, you run the risk of letting it consume you. Not a sports fan? Fair enough. What about Lawrence Woolsey’s take from MATINEE (1993)? Woolsey avers that through experiencing fear and coming out safely on the other side is the only way we can feel truly alive. What I’m getting at here is that human beings like — nay, they need to be scared, and it’s not just hearing scary stories that has merit, but there are virtues inherent in the creative process as well. These are the very heady theorems tackled in the 2020 horror/comedy Shudder Original, SCARE ME. Whew! A huge burden is lifted just by putting the title there on the page, right? Intros are fucking hard!
Anyway, just coming off of Halloween (the highest of the high holidays for us in the spooky sect), I’m sure everyone’s watchlists were laden with ghouls and ghosts. Prequels and sequels that send buxom coeds running for the attic or basement, pursued by whatever glacial-paced butcher that wants to inflict unspeakable harm. Scary stuff, right? Well, that’s child’s play (no Chucky, put your baby hand down, it’s not your turn yet) compared to the utter terror put forth in the 104 spine-chilling minutes of SCARE ME. The evil we face in this cinematic offering, intrepid audience, is no mere corporeal killer like Michael, Freddy, or Jason. No such luck. The foe we face is a merciless one-two punch of comparison culture and writer’s block. Ahhhh! I’ve got goosebumps just from seeing the words! So submitted for the approval of the Grindhouse Society (trademark pending) I submit to you Josh Ruben’s SCARE ME (throws non-dairy creamer on the fire in a completely original idea)!
Written, directed, and starring Josh Ruben, SCARE ME follows his portrayal of the downtrodden Fred, who is an aspiring horror author cloistering himself in a secluded snow swept cabin in upstate New York in order to write his magnum opus. While procrastinating through a bout of writer’s block, he encounters Fanny, played magnificently by Aya Cash, who is a best-selling horror author and the living embodiment of his creative and professional fantasies and who just so happens to be vacationing in the cabin next door. While hating-Googling the aforementioned literary goliath, the power cuts out and Fred is jump-scared by Fanny, rapping upon his window pane. She too is without power and invites herself over to Fred’s cabin in the hopes of whiling away the winter evening in a rather novel way… by telling each other scary stories. So conventional wisdom might see this as a set-up to your standard horror-anthology film format, with each person taking turns spinning a yarn only to cut away to a whole production actualizing their anecdotes with lights, camera, action! Show, not tell in this visual medium, right? Heck, they even take turns doing pretty spot-on Crypt Keeper impressions! Sure, that’s a logical leap to take, but this film is gunning for anything but conventional.
Instead, what we get is something that is truly a celebration of the act of storytelling, as two weavers of the macabre engage in a verbal battle of one-upmanship and even collaboration, to bring their terrifying tales to life using their words buttressed by established lighting and audio cues to immerse the viewer without cutting away from our claustrophobic little cabin in the woods. That’s right, besides the opening commute with chatty cabby Bettina, played perfectly by Key & Peele writer Rebecca Drysdale, and an impromptu pizza party with delivery driver Carlo, acted audaciously by Saturday Night Live stalwart Chris Redd, we’re trapped in a thrilling tête-à-tête as two raconteurs engage in rhetorical war as they do their damnedest to surpass and at times strengthen each other’s spontaneous scary stories!
To the uninitiated, two people monologuing for the duration of a feature-length film might seem monotonous, but the colossal chops of Aya Cash and Josh Ruben bring Fanny and Fred’s fables to life with an unparalleled humor and horror that keeps your eyes glued to that caliginous cottage. Further engaging our attention is Ruben’s directorial prowess. He expertly uses light and sound to immerse audiences into each story while always hinting to something sinister simmering on the periphery. Shadows and light bathe our bards of the lodge to punctuate plot points, all while keeping our focus on the witty repartee and not the mounting tension building ominously in the dark corners of each scene. Can Fanny’s knowledge and success elevate Fred’s storytelling? Will Fred’s enthusiasm inspire Fanny’s future blockbusters? Are they all just stories, or does something more wicked this way come? That’s the genius behind this film. There’s space for you to visualize your own monsters and motivations like the blank pages at the end of THE NEVERENDING STORY. We as the audience get to become part of the story by virtue of hearing it. We dream up our own features as the tale unfolds, making each viewing of this film (as well as any other fireside story) a singular experience. SCARE ME shows us how special that can be, as well as the potentiality for dread.
Will SCARE ME actually scare the bejesus out of you? Probably not, and it’s not supposed to. While ostensibly about horror stories, the crux of the movie is about what it takes to construct these fictions, and the reciprocal relationship between storyteller and listener. Besides being a fundamental part of communicating the human condition, scary stories act as a dress rehearsal for real-life fight-or-flight scenarios in a controlled environment. Think of it as an emotional version of the X-Men’s “Danger Room,” the high-tech obstacle course, where our aspiring heroes face facsimiles of foes, perils, and pitfalls in the safety of their X-Mansion. Frequent exposure to fictions intended to inspire an acute stress response can train the body and mind to harness the full potential of your mutant power: fear. Therefore, those who caucus around chilling compositions are tantamount to cognitive gym rats, making one another better equipped to deal with the terrors and tragedies of modernity. So as the world teeters ever closer to fiery ruin, there are no other people I would rather have join me in the foxhole than my siblings in celebrating all things spooky, because by living and breathing scary stories, they, true believers, are made of sterner stuff.
Tags: Aya Cash, Brendan H. Banks, Chris Redd, comedy, Horror, Josh Ruben, Rebecca Drysdale, Shudder
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