Not many people dislike CREEPSHOW.
How could you? The EC Comics tribute features the horror royalty team-up of director George A. Romero and writer Stephen King, special effects by Tom Savini, and an all-star cast consisting of genre greats (Adrienne Barbeau, Hal Holbrook, Tom Atkins), silver screen legends (Leslie Nielsen, E.G. Marshall, Viveca Lindfors), and some hands-down hunks (Ted Danson, Ed Harris, Hal Holbrook). You’d be pretty safe in saying it’s one of the greatest horror anthologies to grace our screens ever, and certainly the most consistently crowd-pleasing.
But then there’s “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill.” The film’s infamous second segment, about a young farmer’s encounter with a fallen meteorite that causes uncontrollable plant growth on his person and property, is considered by many to be the black sheep of CREEPSHOW’s otherwise stellar lineup of terrifying tales. The reason given for that assessment almost always centers on Stephen King’s role as the title character, and while the author does tend to go a little — ahem — big with his performance, that criticism shouldn’t stop viewers from giving it a fair shake.
Which leads me to this confession (wipes sweat from brow, takes a deep breath): this is actually my favorite story in the film.
Let me explain!
“The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill” scares me in a way the rest of CREEPSHOW’s tales don’t.
While most of the anthology involves bad people getting their comeuppance for the evil deeds they’ve done, this part has no scales to balance. Under the hammy acting and copious amounts of “meteor shit,” it’s a story about the unpredictability of life and the cruelty of fate. Jordy is just a regular guy looking to enjoy some solitude and a few hours of good old fashioned pro rasslin’ when, unbeknownst to him, he’s sent on a journey into cosmic horror after the universe decides to turn its ice-cold gaze upon him.
A meteorite (like the finger of some malevolent god) falls from the celestial heavens and strikes his land. Out of all the places on earth where this could have happened, his unassuming little patch of dirt is where chance decides to send a nightmare. This seemingly random twist of fate triggers a chain of events that will lead Jordy to a transformation he cannot begin to imagine and, like our own eventual dirt naps, there is absolutely nothing the poor sap can do to stop it.
[NOTE: I know what you’re thinking. “What if he had just left the thing alone, instead of deciding to go outside and poke the weird pulsating orb he finds in his yard?” To which I ask, who among us wouldn’t want to make contact with something otherworldly if presented the opportunity? True, he could have used a stick, or at the very least put on some damn gloves, but hindsight is 20/20 (especially in horror movies) so let’s cut him a little slack.]
The other reason I find Jordy’s story so affecting is, to put it plainly, I just feel bad for the guy.
We’re given very little info about his situation, but from what we can gather he seems to be the type of person who can’t get out of his own way. From his initial mistake of trying to cool down the meteor so he can sell it for some quick cash (how sad is it that a $200 asking price is the best he can fantasize about?) to him inadvertently fueling the growth of the organism within him, everything he does draws the noose around his neck tighter and tighter. In fact, the only thing Jordy manages to be successful at is killing himself. How can your heart not break when he rasps, “Please God… let my luck be in. Please God… just this once!” before blowing his moss-covered skull to bits?
That’s some heavy shit. Jordy didn’t deserve to go out like that and his segment, questionable acting choices and all, deserves better too.
Tags: Adrienne Barbeau, Christine Forrest, comedy, E.G. Marshall, EC Comics, Ed Harris, Fritz Weaver, Gaylen Ross, George A. Romero, Hal Holbrook, Horror, Joe Hill, John Amplas, John Harrison, Leslie Nielsen, Michael Gornick, Pasquale Buba, Richard P. Rubinstein, Stephen King, Ted Danson, Tom Atkins, tom savini, Viveca Lindfors, Warner Shook
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