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Screenwriter Lorenzo Semple Jr.’s story pitch to producer Dino De Laurentiis: “A greedy oil company executive ignores the warnings of some paleontologist dude about a dangerous island in the Indian Ocean, sends a ship there in search of black gold and discovers King Kong instead. Kong falls for a blonde girl the ship picked up along the way, fights a giant snake and ends up back in New York City for a climatic rampage.” Dino’s response: “Great, and we’ll spend ungodly amounts of money on mediocre special effects that don’t include any stop-motion animation,  build a $ 1.7 million dollar 40 foot mechanical gorilla that will receive a total of 15 seconds of screen time and there will be no dinosaurs. And oh yes, Kong will wear his hair on the teaser poster like Vinnie Barbarino.”

Thankfully Dino never remade STAR WARS, as he’d probably forget to set it in outer space.

Zevk,

Poe

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Jon Abrams

Editor-In-Chief at Daily Grindhouse

Jon Abrams is a New York-based writer, cartoonist, and committed cinemaniac whose complete work and credits can be found at his site, Demon’s Resume. You can contact him on Twitter as @JonZilla___.

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