Hey Bastards.
Time to grab a shot of rye and turn on grindhouse cinema until the clock reads 3:00 AM. Here are the Top 10 flicks we are digging right now on Netflix Instant, click the poster to queue this good shit up. Hopefully you can find something here to punch your eyeballs with.
10. EATEN ALIVE (1977)
The third film from Tobe Hooper is far less iconic than TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE but just as creepy. EATEN ALIVE reunites Hooper and Marilyn Burns (Sally from TCM) and also features Robert Englund, four alarm fire Roberta Collins (THE BIG DOLL HOUSE, CAGED HEAT, DEATH RACE 2000), and an insanely creepy Neville Brand as the Innkeeper of the Starlight Hotel where you check in alive…and check out dead. Ring up another classic for Hooper.
9. SHEBA, BABY (1975)
The foxy one plays the titular Sheba, a no-nonsense private eye taking on the mob. Granted, if forced to live on a remote island and I had to choose one Grier flick, SHEBA, BABY wouldn’t make the cut – but it’s still fun, and Pam is hot as ever. No surprise there.
Besides, if a flick has a comma in the title, you know that shit is straight!
8. TO THE DEVIL A DAUGHTER (1976)
Hammer’s remake of THE LADY VANISHES may have bankrupted the studio, but TO THE DEVIL A DAUGHTER picked out the coffin and helped dig the hole. In fact, it may have helped drag down the fabled studio just as much as the Gould/Shepherd abortion. This is a solid flick though and didn’t deserve the bum-rush it got. Christopher Lee turns in a pretty good bat-shit crazy performance as the demented Father Rayner.
7. ZAPPED! (1981)
A spoof on both CARRIE and Scott Baio’s career. This is just as bad as you would think it is. Baio and his co-star Willie Aimes had such great chemistry they were paired together for the TV show CHARLES IN CHARGE, later followed by the Baio/Aimes gay porn classics CHARLES CHARGED ME, and CHARLES CHARGED ME II: FUCK YOU, JOANIE! Dig it, Bastards!
6. TINTORERA: KILLER SHARK (1977)
Nothing defines a killer shark movie better than a good three-way with Susan George.
All hotness aside, this flick blows dogs. This shit-shark is best summed up by the following bit of trivia from IMDB: The underwater scenes showing the Tintorera are stock footage, and the shark is barely five feet long (although it is described as “the largest shark ever seen” at over seven feet long due to trick photography).
Yup, it’s that bad, so you GOTS to know we are going to be hitting play on this bad-boy. Dig it, Bastards!
5. BLACK MOON RISING (1986)
This is jam-packed with all kinds of tough. John Carpenter produced, Tommy Lee Jones and Linda Hamilton star, Bubba Smith co-stars, and Robert Vaughn is the villain. That’s enough to slap your momma.
5. BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS (1980)
Saint-Exmin (Sybil Danning): Shad, did you see me on the monitor? There was a fighter right on my tail… I pulled up… and smashed him into an asteroid!
Shad: [grimly] I’m glad this is so much fun for you. These aren’t YOUR people we’re fighting for.
Saint-Exmin: It’s not that I don’t empathize; That’s the Valkyrie Creed: “Live fast, fight well and have a beautiful ending.”
Shad: [looking her in the eyes] NO VIOLENT DEATH IS BEAUTIFUL!
Saint-Exmin: [smiling] You’ve never seen a Valkyrie go down…
This concludes the un-official Robert Vaughn double feature…
4. GRAND THEFT AUTO (1977)
Ron Howard’s directorial debut is a better flick than the companion film EAT MY DUST which is kind of on the quirky side. GTA has some inventive scenes, cool crashes, the Corman feel, and Clint Howard sucking off the teat of his brother… the first of several such suckles.
3. DEATH RACE 2000 (1973)
One of the crowing jewels in the Corman archives. Over the top mayhem, fast cars, blood by the gallons, and humor with a pitch black heart. Dig. This. Shit!
AND NOW…
THE DG DOUBLE FEATURE
WITH ROGER CORMAN & JONATHAN DEMME
Jonathan Demme worked with Roger Corman from 1971-1976. In that time, Demme worked on films like THE HOT BOX, BLACK MAMA WHITE MAMA, and the two flicks in our double. Dig it, Bastards!
2. CRAZY MAMA (1975)
This opened just nine months after Corman’s BIG BAD MAMA with Angie Dickinson, that flick is more representative of the type films Corman was banging out than Demme’s CRAZY MAMA; A nutty road comedy with car chases, gun fights, and a hardly any T&A, a rarity for Corman. This is a cool film though especially when you consider where Demme has gone as a director.
1. CAGED HEAT (1974)
This is some good shit! Simultaneously dark, visceral, and quirky, this is one of the best films in the Corman catalog and among the best films that Demme has ever made. Impressive considering this was his directorial debut. You could easily get scholarly with this film and talk about subtext and how Demme is elevating the material, but kill that noise. Sit back, and dig this grindhouse masterpiece.
HERE’S TO GOOD WATCHING THIS WEEKEND, SALUTE!
THE DG BASTARDS
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