Day Seven. I think that’s supposed to be the day of rest, but we’re still just getting started here. Featured today: A few things to make you happy and one thing to make you furious. That’s still a bargain, in this day and age. It’s usually the other way around: A bunch of things to make you furious, minus the one to make you happy. We are here for you.
DEATH OF A UNICORN!
I saw it tonight! Lots of fun. Something new for horror movies, though I use the term “horror” lightly. Paul Rudd and Jenna Ortega should make lots more movies together. Stay tuned for the DG review!
CLOWN IN A CORNFIELD!
We’re so happy to see Adam Cesare headed onward and upward! CLOWN IN A CORNFIELD is his successful YA series that gives you exactly what the title promises, and now it’s a feature film! Among other cool things about the movie, it features 2024 Bizarro Oscar-winner (for Best Villain) Kevin Durand!
Here’s the trailer:
And the DG review of the film is coming right up, in case you can’t wait for more.
MEANWHILE, IN THE REAL WORLD, WHICH IS FLAMING GARBAGE…
Palestinian filmmaker Hamdan Ballal, who codirected 2024’s Oscar-winning documentary NO OTHER LAND, has been lynched and abducted. His current whereabouts are unknown. The reporting so far is incomplete and conflicting in places.
The film has been difficult to see so far in America because of what I would generously call our national widespread moral cowardice. Don’t ask me to be generous about what Israel has been doing. Please, if you will, join me in praying for a swift and safe return home for Hamdan Ballal, a brave artist in a terrible time.
Follow his Israeli co-director Yuval Abraham for updates we can trust. Sorry to say I don’t trust Israeli authorities as far as I can throw them. For what it’s worth, I’m a Jew, so whenever I denounce Israel’s genocidal actions and call Netanyahu a war criminal, nobody gets to accuse me of being “anti-Semitic.” This is about right and wrong, and about which of us will be damned forever. Bring Hamdan home.
QUICK, LET’S SEE SOMETHING FUN…
The toy company NECA, in collaboration with Target, is beginning its Haulathon event come April 11th. The highlight so far is Pee-Wee, if you ask me, but everything NECA does is quality.
In other fun-stuff news, Trick Or Treat Studios has a sale on games and puzzles until the end of the month. I’m a fan of that company too.
G20 IS COMING…
The upcoming movie G20, starring Viola Davis as Action President, has released a new poster in the classic American tradition of “Everyone is different sizes, with different expressions, looking in different directions.”
Our nation used to unite behind President Harrison Ford kicking Russian hijackers off his damn plane. In a far more divided America, just a month or so ago, some of us watched President Harrison Ford turn into a Hulk. The times, they are a-changing. Is America ready for President Viola Davis? Or for half the cast of TV’s Black-Ish as the First Family? With Homelander from The Boys as their enemy? Find out in April!
THE MUMMY RETURNS…
Lee Cronin, who last directed EVIL DEAD RISES, is shooting THE MUMMY in Ireland, with Jack Reynor of MIDSOMMAR. Both Reynor and Cronin are Irish. Given that and the shooting location, I have to wonder if maybe this time around The Mummy is going to be a bog body. That would be intriguing!
This will be the third Blumhouse version of Universal Monsters characters. INVISIBLE MAN was good. WOLF MAN, not so much. Will this one be good? Maybe! I am on record (and in the minority, apparently) as having thoroughly despised EVIL DEAD RISES, but not because I didn’t think Cronin showed lots of promise as a director. I’ll be cautiously optimistic here.
(Pictured above: The hand of Old Croghan Man, on display at the National Museum of Ireland. Maybe don’t Google the whole thing.)
BEST MRS. VOORHEES EVER?
No offense meant, ever, to Betsy Palmer, late and lamented, who was unforgettable. But if you’re going to cast a young Pamela Voorhees, or any role really, you are never going to go wrong with Linda Cardellini. The TV series will be called Crystal Lake and it will air on Peacock. That’s mostly all we know for now. Let’s stay optimistic. The clearest precedent for this idea is maybe less Friday The 13th: The Series than the more recent Bates Motel, which also featured a tremendous actress in the role of mother to a future monster. I saw a lot of that series, and it was interesting for a while, though maybe not as memorable ultimately as I’d have wished. Again, let’s stay optimistic.
GRACE POTTER!
Musician and songwriter Grace Potter has released the second “Micro-Film” in a series for her song “Before The Sky Falls.” The first one came out about a week ago. It’s just Grace, the wind, the landscape, and the music. That’s all you need, really.
- [THE BIG QUESTION] WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE FEMALE ENSEMBLE IN MOVIES? - July 22, 2016
- [IN THEATERS NOW] THE BOY (2016) - January 24, 2016
- Cult Movie Mania Releases Lucio Fulci Limited Edition VHS Sets - January 5, 2016
Tags: A24, Adam Cesare, Columns, daily grindhouse, Documentaries, Evil Clowns, Friday the 13th, Grace Potter, Hamdan Ballal, Ireland, Jenna Ortega, Jon Abrams, Kevin Durand, Linda Cardellini, music, NECA, Old Croghan Man, Palestine, Paul Rudd, Toys, Trailers, Unicorns, Yuval Abraham
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